Untrue: Why Nearly Everything We Believe About Women, Lust, and Infidelity Is Wrong and How the New Science Can Set Us Free

This book is an absolute game-changer for anyone interested in the intersection of biology and sociology. Wednesday Martin deconstructs the tired myth that women are naturally more monogamous or have lower libidos than men. I found the sections on primate behavior, especially the Bonobos, to be incredibly illuminating and well-researched. It’s written with a certain punchy energy that makes the dense academic concepts feel accessible. Frankly, it’s about time someone challenged the patriarchal narrative that has shamed female desire for centuries. While the author's focus is occasionally narrow, the broader points about sexual autonomy and the 'cliterate' perspective are revolutionary. You won’t look at traditional marriage the same way again after reading this.

Finally got around to reading this and it was such a validating experience. For so long, we’ve been fed this 'Disney' version of female desire—that we just want to be swept off our feet and then stay satisfied forever. Martin uses her platform to scream the truth: women want variety and novelty too. The way she bridges the gap between the #MeToo movement and our prehistoric heritage is brilliant. The writing is incredibly readable, and I finished the whole thing in just two sittings. It's informative, timely, and honestly quite brave. By bringing these 'taboo' voices to the surface, she’s helping to dismantle a system that has shamed us for far too long. Highly recommended for anyone questioning the status quo.

As a reader who loved Sex at Dawn, I found Untrue to be the perfect companion piece focused specifically on the female experience. It is thoroughly researched and provides a much-needed paradigm shift regarding how we view female infidelity. The truth is, the way we structure modern marriage often runs counter to our biological hardwiring. Martin explains this without being dry or overly academic; her voice is engaging and witty throughout. I especially loved the deep dive into how female sexual strategies have been suppressed by agrarian and patriarchal forces over time. It’s a substantive tour of desire that manages to be both frothy and deep. If you want to understand what actually turns women on, this is the book.

Wow, what a provocative and eye-opening journey into the hidden side of female psychology. The book is essentially an unfettering of sexuality, stripping away the distortion layers that society forces us to wear. I found the comparison between women’s experiences of long-term monogamy versus men’s to be a total contradiction of conventional wisdom. It’s fast-paced, well-written, and refreshing to see someone tackle these 'uncomfortable' truths with such candor. Martin doesn’t shy away from the messy parts of human nature. The truth is, some might find her take on 'stepping out' controversial, but the data she presents about the costs of honesty in our society is worth reflecting on. It's a beautifully told, important story that stays with you.

After hearing so much buzz about this, I was worried it wouldn't live up to the hype, but it exceeded it. This is a riveting look at how female sexuality continues to be stigmatized by artificial social constructions. The anecdotes are told in a way that made me laugh out loud while also giving me pause to think about my own biases. Personally, I think it’s not just a book about cheating; it’s a book about autonomy and the right to agency. Martin's writing style is superb, even if it feels a little too 'Manhattan' at times. The way she deconstructs the 'natural' versus the 'cultural' is masterfully done. Every woman should read this just to realize they aren't 'weird' for having complex desires.

Picked this up on a whim after seeing it mentioned in a podcast, and I have to say it’s engaging as hell. The pace is brisk, almost like a novel, which is rare for a book that cites so many studies. Martin explores how society treats 'untrue' women versus men, and the double standards she highlights are infuriating but necessary to discuss. My only real gripe is that one section towards the middle feels a bit like a disconnected college essay, lacking the smooth voice found in the rest of the text. Still, the core message about female sexual strategies is eye-opening. It definitely pushes you to think outside the traditional box of 'good' and 'bad' behavior. It’s a fast, provocative read that I’d recommend to any open-minded reader.

Ever wonder why we’ve been told the same story about women’s sexuality for a thousand years? Untrue provides a refreshing, if slightly controversial, counter-narrative that challenges our assumptions. The research into the Himba tribe and other non-Western cultures was particularly fascinating to me. To be fair, I think she generalizes too much from her Manhattan social circle, but the biological arguments are hard to ignore. The book moves quickly and keeps you hooked with a mix of personal anecdotes and hard data. It’s not a manual on how to cheat, but rather an investigation into why we do. I didn't agree with every conclusion, but I appreciate the bold perspective she brings to a taboo topic. It's a much-needed unfettering of the female experience.

Frankly, I have really mixed feelings about this one. On one hand, the anthropological research into female primates and ancient societies is absolutely gripping. Martin is an excellent writer with a superb vocabulary and a talent for making sociology feel like a page-turner. However, the book feels very rooted in an Upper East Side bubble that doesn't always translate to the real world. She seems to look at monogamous women with a certain level of contempt, which felt unnecessary and judgmental. The analysis sometimes confuses correlation with causation, especially regarding her use of niche historical research. It’s a well-told story, but the lack of concern for the emotional fallout of these 'adventures' made it a difficult pill to swallow. Worth a read for the science, but take the lifestyle perspective with a grain of salt.

The chapter on cuckolding and Craigslist ads was where I started to lose interest in the author's logic. While the book starts with interesting biological premises, it quickly devolves into a series of anecdotes that reek of a certain 'GirlBoss' feminism that ignores economic reality. She ignores the fact that in many parts of the world, women are routinely killed for the behaviors she is celebrating as 'natural.' The research sample size is also tiny—less than 40 people—which makes her sweeping conclusions feel scientifically flimsy. Not gonna lie, the tone can be quite sanctimonious at times. It felt like she was trying too hard to be the 'cool girl' of sociology while ignoring the ethical complexities of betrayal. Just read Emily Nagoski instead if you want better science.

Look, the writing style here is actually quite good—it's fluid and sophisticated—but the premise is fundamentally broken. Martin essentially attempts to rationalize betrayal by framing affairs as a biological imperative or a revolutionary act for women. She completely ignores the concept of informed consent. There is a massive, sessions-long difference between ethical non-monogamy and lying to your partner. Calling an affair 'stepping out' is just a way to sanitize the trauma and PTSD that infidelity causes for the person left behind. This book feels like a self-serving apologia for selfishness disguised as feminist empowerment. It’s juvenile to suggest that we should stop trying to be monogamous just because it’s hard. I found the dismissal of the partner's agency to be truly disturbing and dangerous.